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The scariest things on Earth

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Wendell
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Posted : February 14, 2021 7:06 pm
nate-the-surveyor
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Angry cows, when they think you are after their calf.?ÿ
Geese, in a yard. They bite, twist, and honk.?ÿ
Phone calls, and nobody is there. I can ad lib a roaring episode of: ƒ??hello? Yes, this is the owner. No, I donƒ??t want to press charges. If you will pay in unmarked bills, meet me down at the bridge, at 4:00 am. Otherwise, Iƒ??ve already retained an attorney. Your call. And hang up. No, itƒ??s not real. But itƒ??s fun.?ÿ

 
Posted : February 14, 2021 7:52 pm
holy-cow
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Nate speaks the truth about angry cows.?ÿ Had one chase me into the bed of a pickup truck, then she decided to jump in also.?ÿ I ended up on top of the cab as she lost her "hoofing" and slipped out of the back.?ÿ Had another thrust her head and neck in through the same truck door I had leapt in through a half second earlier in an attempt to get away from her.

Here's proof John Denver was never chased by a mad mama cow-------

?ÿ

Well life on the farm is kinda laid back
Ain't much an old country boy like me can't hack
It's early to rise, early in the sack
I thank God I'm a country boy
Well a simple kinda life never did me no harm
A raisin' me a family and workin' on a farm
My days are all filled with an easy country charm
Thank God I'm a country boy
?ÿ
And, as for geese, there won't be any around this place.?ÿ The wife had a couple back when we were first dating.?ÿ My middle daughter learned very quickly how vicious those critters can be for no reason at all.?ÿ They may look harmless, but wipe that thought out of your head.
?ÿ
Horses are another example of people thinking they are sooooooooooo gentle.?ÿ Nope.?ÿ They are luring you into their trap.............THEN BAMMMMMMMMM.............bad things happen.?ÿ No more horses around here.
 
Posted : February 14, 2021 9:27 pm
holy-cow
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Actually the scariest thing on Earth is what you know is about to happen after some dispute with the spouse when you hear the word, "Fine!"

 
Posted : February 14, 2021 9:28 pm
jhframe
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Posted by: @holy-cow

And, as for geese, there won't be any around this place.?ÿ The wife had a couple back when we were first dating.?ÿ My middle daughter learned very quickly how vicious those critters can be for no reason at all.?ÿ They may look harmless, but wipe that thought out of your head.

I've never been attacked by a flock of geese, but I was attacked by a lone member of a flock once.?ÿ My solution was to pick him up by the neck and fling him as far as I could.?ÿ He didn't come after me again.

 
Posted : February 14, 2021 9:38 pm

jitterboogie
(@jitterboogie)
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Camels.

 
Posted : February 14, 2021 9:50 pm
paden-cash
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What's the scariest thing on Earth??ÿ That's easy, an angry woman with a willow switch.?ÿ

Now my ex-wife could go bear hunting with a coat hanger...

 
Posted : February 14, 2021 10:09 pm
(@bstrand)
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@jitterboogie?ÿ

 
Posted : February 15, 2021 12:34 am
(@frankg)
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Scariest thing. ?ÿWhen you loan out your tap to a TxDot inspector to measure an abutment form and itƒ??s short by 1.0ƒ??. ?ÿEven after it was measure with the instrument. ?ÿGuess both end didnƒ??t realize that the 100ƒ?? tape had a -1.0ƒ?? offset.?ÿ

 
Posted : February 15, 2021 5:22 am
paden-cash
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Posted by: @frankg

Scariest thing. ?ÿWhen you loan out your tap to a TxDot inspector to measure an abutment form and itƒ??s short by 1.0ƒ??. ?ÿEven after it was measure with the instrument. ?ÿGuess both end didnƒ??t realize that the 100ƒ?? tape had a -1.0ƒ?? offset.?ÿ

I've seen that very thing happen..sort of.

On a paving project we were having lunch under a shade tree.?ÿ The hombres?ÿon the concrete crew were using the same shade tree for their break.?ÿ We all got to chatting (in two different languages) and they were checking out the equipment in the back of the truck.

I had an old 100' roll up tape that the hook on the end had been broken off.?ÿ Someone had tied a knot at the 1' mark and we used it as a "cut chain", usually when we were measuring from references and looking for corners just to get us in the general vicinity.

One of the manos took a fancy to it so I gave it to him.?ÿ We didn't use it much and I was happy to recycle it.?ÿ I showed him the broken end and attempted to explain how we used it.?ÿ He nodded and replied, "Si, si".

The next day the concrete foreman asked me to check some paving stakes on a radius that didn't seem to be fitting very well.?ÿ Sure enough they apparently had used the tape that was missing the first foot.?ÿ I told the foreman about the tape.?ÿ He drove over, dug it up out of the crew's tools and pitched it in a trash can.?ÿ I remember he told me, "You were assuming they knew what they were doing".?ÿ ?ÿ

Apparently I was.?ÿ?ÿ

 
Posted : February 15, 2021 5:55 am

stlsurveyor
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@jim-frame I found once while playing golf that a pitching edge was very effective.

N10,000, E7,000, Z100.00 PLS - MO, KS, CO, MN, KY

 
Posted : February 15, 2021 6:11 am
paden-cash
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@stlsurveyor

A 36" wooden lath works pretty good too.?ÿ Goosie didn't know what hit him.

 
Posted : February 15, 2021 6:13 am
jitterboogie
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@paden-cash

Do you like root veggies with your Gander?

???? ?????ÿ

 
Posted : February 15, 2021 6:24 am
Jim in AZ
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@holy-cow

I'm happy to hear that I'm not the only one who deeply distrusts these 4-legged beasts. I've been bitten by horses and stampede by cattle... Never had an encounter with geese, but have been attacked by grackles, who just won't stop once they decide you are a threat.

 
Posted : February 15, 2021 6:56 am
MightyMoe
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@nate-the-surveyor

By cow/calf you mean moose don't you?

 
Posted : February 15, 2021 7:17 am

FL/GA PLS
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@paden-cash

B139C59F C0F4 4977 8C42 FF3DFBE48C19
 
Posted : February 15, 2021 7:25 am
nate-the-surveyor
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Posted by: @mightymoe

@nate-the-surveyor

By cow/calf you mean moose don't you?

?ÿ

never had a run in with that variety but Iƒ??m sure Iƒ??d fail to record the interaction!!!

 
Posted : February 15, 2021 8:39 am
nate-the-surveyor
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@payden

ƒ??Our lady of assumptionƒ? is the patron saint of surveyors.?ÿ

I assume you agree!!

???

 
Posted : February 15, 2021 8:51 am
(@shildebrand)
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northern Manitoba flagging a ROW for a all season road helicopter access only was about half way through my day so about 6 hours away from any possible way of leaving the area.?ÿ found a opening in the snow by a rock formation that seemed to have a little steam coming out so as we all do when curious i got closer to investigate.?ÿ I got close but not close enough to see before my sense of smell and hearing picked up on the fact i had just stumbled on a hibernating bear! quietly kept on flagging wishing i had brought spare pants lol.

 
Posted : February 17, 2021 12:56 pm
jitterboogie
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@bstrand

See my other camels post.....

 
Posted : February 17, 2021 6:21 pm