Here is an either/or type question

Samuel's without question.

In true surveyor fashion, I won't say one or the other is ideal.?ÿ I favor Sam's, and like having some details of his life and career, but I felt it went on a little too long and was written in a choppy style.

I don't particularly like the (spouse) notation, but have to accept it as the modern norm.

Sam's but I prefer a photo of the deceased in their prime, less about work, and more about personal interests and stories.

I wish I had met Sam.

Fred's is what you get when you outlive everyone who knew you. I say this recognizing that he left behind several people with his surname.

Fred was the first born of six boys and two girls.?ÿ The four boys in the middle were the wildest bunch of jokers you would ever hope to meet and three of those four still are today.?ÿ The fourth, Howard, would have had a blast if he had seen his name misspelled as Hooward.?ÿ Youngest of the eight is 73.

Sam was from a small, conservative family and had a small, conservative family.?ÿ Pillar of the community type.?ÿ They neglected to mention that in his young years he was quite the musician that played in a wide variety of venues with more than one band.?ÿ His bride-to-be was the niece (or maybe younger sister to) a fellow who purchased a barracks building after WW II and moved it onto a pasture out in the boonies.?ÿ Named it The Gizmo.?ÿ People from all over came to party, dance, see there neighbors, roller skate, you-name-it at The Gizmo.?ÿ Sam's band played there often.?ÿ That is how he met his wife.?ÿ Not a story I ever heard repeated by anyone in his quiet, conservative family.

@holy-cow kind of hard to believe a car dealer is quiet and conservative?ÿ

He preferred to be the head mechanic.

Here's a weird story from that mechanic shop.?ÿ Many years ago while at work I met a fellow who had grown up not far from there.?ÿ As we chatted, he asked if I knew another fellow by the name of Jack.?ÿ I sure did.?ÿ In fact, his youngest brother was my classmate.?ÿ The guy explained that when he and Jack were looking for a bit of fun they would stop by the dealership garage.?ÿ They might just chat with whoever had time to chat or offer to run errands or maybe help a little with some project.?ÿ One day when they were there, a customer came into the shop.?ÿ He noticed the two boys and asked one of the mechanics why they were present.?ÿ The mechanic said, "Ignore them, they're just Jack 'N' Off."?ÿ The fellow I had just met explained, "I'm Off.?ÿ Richard switched to being known as 'Jack'.?ÿ It has stuck ever since."?ÿ That conversation took place over 35 years ago.?ÿ Off, that is, Donald died about a year ago.?ÿ Jack, that is, Richard is still kicking and just as ornery as ever.

Something between the two. ?ÿI thought Samƒ??s was a little long.

Being an enthusiast for local history and genealogical research far beyond my own family, I mine long obituaries for a glimpse at the genealogy of the deceased, the various work places they name that may no longer exist and general history.?ÿ Sometimes the long ones do drag on too long.?ÿ Then, again, sometimes they can be entertaining.?ÿ I discovered a family not too long ago that have given the sons the same middle name.?ÿ Sort of a Billy Bob, Joe Bob, Hank Bob, Ralph Bob sort of family.

I have read many long obituaries over the decades that appeared in The Boise City News based in the Oklahoma Panhandle for families I have never met or known.?ÿ Boise City is roughly 30 miles from where my grandfather homesteaded a quarter section between 1907 and 1912.?ÿ My parents lived near there for several months in 1943.?ÿ Anything in any of the generally very long obituaries that ties into those time frames is especially of interest.?ÿ Many of those homesteaders came from Western Missouri, including quite a few from my grandfather's home area.

A little late to the party but Sammy's is "like it is", but does it really make any difference? The deceased is unaware of the whole funeral fiasco anyway. Funerals are nothing but a gross waste of money. IMO, (and I got's lot's of 'em) the bereaved would better off using the money for counceling or partying, depending.

good god, i've turned into a wretched old man! ?????ÿ

?ÿ

Far-back genealogy was once of interest mainly to the likes of the DAR and Mayflower society.?ÿ I had a great aunt who traced multiple lines back to colonial times, working in the 1950's and 60's when you had to personally go to each courthouse to find most records.

At the same time, many families passed on their knowledge, heirlooms, stories, and and traditions from recent generations.

Then we had a boom in genealogy interest, coupled with greater availability of information. That interest has since faded, even as information has become even easier to get, and fewer people care about long family trees.

The legacies within families have also lost interest. The daughter of that great aunt could not get her children interested in heritage or family heirlooms. My wife couldn't give away to her daughter, niece, or nephew many things passed down in her family. I have some hope my niece will someday value and curate the data I have collected, but am not sure of it.

?ÿ

Posted by: @flga-2-2

but does it really make any difference? The deceased is unaware of the whole funeral fiasco anyway.

Funerals are to provide closure and emotional support for the survivors.

Obituaries are a person's last chance to leave a record, and may be appreciated by some in the future.

As to the expense, yeah, I've told people to go the cheaper route for mine.?ÿ I had to give up the argument with my sister and let her have the $1k more expensive box for Dad, to be seen for only a few hours and most people wouldn't even notice.

The information on genealogy that can be obtained online FOR FREE is out of this world.?ÿ Obviously, one needs to crosscheck such data via different sources to verify.?ÿ Here is information for a lady buried in the cemetery for which I serve on the Board of Trustees and the ground had been donated by this lady and her husband.?ÿ This is the data I wish I had had over 30 years ago as this provides the link between my family and several other local families WHO NEVER KNEW they were related to each other, let alone to me.?ÿ Note that she was one of 19 siblings and then had eight children of her own.?ÿ In a family such as that, being able to name all of your first cousins would be a chore, let alone second, third and fourth cousins.?ÿ Several years ago when I was in North Carolina to meet with a fellow who grew up in this area, we did quite a bit of talking about local families and history.?ÿ He asked if I knew of any connection between his grandfather Crabbe and another local fellow of similar age named Simmons who seemed to be at their house routinely.?ÿ After some research I found that those two were second cousins, descended from Jesse and Mary Ann Covert.?ÿ But, I had no idea I was related to any of them.

Mary Ann COVERT (born Eye), 1830 - 1908

Posted by: @bill93

As to the expense, yeah, I've told people to go the cheaper route for mine.?ÿ I had to give up the argument with my sister and let her have the $1k more expensive box for Dad, to be seen for only a few hours and most people wouldn't even notice.

My FIL said he just wanted a plain wood box; my MIL went for the midrange Oak. Coulda saved $1,000 on something you're going to bury and never see again...

I know one family that had a HUGE fight over 60 years ago because one view point was that dear old Dad didn't have a decent suit to be buried in and the other side argued that the viewers at the funeral really wouldn't care one way or the other.?ÿ Half the family ponied up for a new suit and the other half didn't.?ÿ Glared at each other across the room at the funeral and NEVER forgot about it.

Saw an obituary a couple days ago where the woman is identified as Brandi (Bambi Too Hot) Lea Smithers.?ÿ Surviving family members included a daughter, seven step-children and her wife, Karen.

Maybe my obituary will add Holy Cow and Santa Claus to my name.