He came in and turned his stuff in. Short version, last week his friends wife was killed in an accident around noon. He was contracting to another company for us, so he packed up and came in to be with his friend around 2:30. No problem there at all. Then he called in the next day around 3 a.m. and left a voice mail. Still no problem. He had spoken with the other surveyor in the office about the accident indicating that it was a dear friend. Still no problem. However, he didn't say whether he needed the next day off, so I had the schedule ready for him to go back to the field. Problem 1. He called in at 7 a.m. saying he needed the time to be with his friend and take him to view the body. Okay, but now I'm in a bit of a bind, and it was early so my tone was probably less than understanding. Anyway, he didn't come in that day and I said that I would see him after the holiday (the crews don't work on Fridays).
So the holiday weekend rocked right along and he showed up at 7 a.m. this morning. I was going to ask how his friend was and see what we could do. Well, didn't get the chance and he quit. He said, among other things, and he was very professional about it, that it was a family company, but not his family and felt like we weren't understanding.
Okay, I get that. However, being on the business side, if he had asked for last week off, I would have given it to him and adjusted the schedule accordingly as I revamped the business model for him, after an accident on his own time, where he couldn't be in the field for 8 weeks or so. He was right, it's a small family company, and we TRY to take care of our own.
Probably could have all been avoided had I been a little more understanding or even used a better tone, this is my fault. However, everyone who schedules crews knows what it's like in the morning figuring out if everyone is there and lining them out to do the job, so it's a little hairy in the morning.
It's a shame really, he's a great chief/SIT who has awesome potential to be a GREAT surveyor. Hopefully, he will land somewhere that will mentor and guide him to chip the diamond out of the rough.
Good luck to him and my prayers are with his friends family.
Is it possible that he'll reconsider? Would you take him back?
Some friends can be closer than family. He was probably providing a lot of support to that friend and that can be exhausting, especially when you are closely involved. Maybe like you he was just upset and did not even consider a week off, It was you that scheduled him without calling and asking what his needs were. Don't slam the door if he is what you say he is. Give him a week, then call him and offer him his job back. Both of you are in the process of showing the world just what you really are, not what you want others to think. One time just a day before we were going to leave San Diego for the Western Pacific, one of our Gunners Mates lost his father who was living in Texas, He asked for leave to be with the family and then hop a ride to the Naval air Station at Pearl Harbor and re-board the Helena. The XO would not allow it, caused much bitterness and the Navy lost a red headed Lifer called Pruitt. Emotions run deep,
keep that in mind.
jud
Kris,
I DON'T see this as your problem of being understanding. I see this as a problem with communication. You thought one thing, he thought another, but there was no discussion (or very little) about the situation. And in that regard, since he needed the time, he should have approached the situation and made sure things were clear, instead of ASSUMING.
Basically, I'm saying don't beat yourself up over it. He sounds like a fine fellow to do what he did for a friend. Maybe the solution can be solved and everything can go back to how it was. If he's as fine a fellow as you say, I'd say not to reprimand or anything, just fine tune your communication issues. That seems to be a problem with so many people and issues today... Person #1 assumes that Person #2 thru Person #16 knows what they are thinking... When that couldn't be farther from the truth. It takes speaking up.
I hope everything works out for the best.
I dunno
Like I said, this is the short version. We'll see where the day takes us. He will come to my house this evening to get his stuff out of the other work truck, so who knows.
Kris
He was contracting through another company to us.
That is what you said so would not the other company be on the hook and not one of their employee's directly to you?
Maybe I'm missing a part.
Deral
"He was contracting to another company for us" is what was said there Mr. Paulk. (I think you might be a little over excited about the CA trip Deral! hahaha)
If he comes back, take him back... Employee's that leave and return make for some of the best employees!
Deral
He was contracting TO another surveying company for us. He was our employee, contract labor to the other surveyor.
Foggy..
I was just trying to figure out the relationship.
Nothing more.
Deral
Kris
Thanks Kris.
That makes it a bit more personal.
I was just a bit confused by your first post. No worries though.
Deral
Kris
Learning experience for all parties......at least it was not a parting on bad terms.
Angelo
Probably the last thing on his mind is his job. Sounds like his priorities are to his friend right now for reasons only he can understand. When someone is consumed by a tragedy they rarely react as someone who was not involved. I agree that you shouldn't beat yourself up for anything that you did. Rather take it as a life experience. Make the best of of what happened and learn. I bet he will do the same.
Of course you did give the short version and I'm sure more detail would change what will be typed here today.
Good luck with things.
I agree JM. When people are grappling with a personal tragedy they are not necessarily going to act in their normal rational manner. Their mind is simply elsewhere. It is part of being human and at the end of the day this guy is not just a PC, he is a human being with all of the inherent flaws that come with that. When he gets his head screwed back on straight, he'll return to being that great PC that you've come to know.
A brusqe tone on your part would have probably been something he could have dealt with in stride on a normal day, just not that day. It appears that he felt like he didn't have the relationship with the firm that he thought he had...unfortunately from what you are saying he actually did/does have exactly that kind of relationship. Hopefully he will realize this, but I do think you will probably have to take the first step to reach out to him. I doubt that pride will allow him to reach out to you, even if he is having second thoughts as the reality of his decision begins to sink in.
Perhaps when he comes to get his belongings you might have the opportunity to let him know just how the company, and yourself, feel about him. It would be a shame to see such a good working relationship come to an end over something like this. Guys like you described are hard to come by and even harder to keep around. But whatever comes of it, I like your generous attitude about it. It's a small community and your paths are almost sure to pass again in the future.
Good luck Kris.
I don't agree, Carl. His friend- and it sounds like a close friend- just lost his wife. NO doubt this guy was grieving too, both for his friend who was lost and for his friend who was left. Put yourself in his situation. Would YOUbe thinking straight about asking for the time off officially? Or would you call telling them what was going on and think they understood you needed the time off. Yes there was a communication problem, but considering one was emotional at the time, his communication problem is understandable. That a family company did not call him to see if he was going to need a few days, that is a little harder to follow. I can see where he would question if he was part of the family.
Not meant to insult you Kris, I just see his view a little better. When you are hurting you don't always think clearly. As the boss, you need to be anticipating what he is not saying in this situation. I hope y'all can work it out.
> I don't agree, Carl. His friend- and it sounds like a close friend- just lost his wife. NO doubt this guy was grieving too, both for his friend who was lost and for his friend who was left. Put yourself in his situation. Would YOUbe thinking straight about asking for the time off officially? Or would you call telling them what was going on and think they understood you needed the time off. Yes there was a communication problem, but considering one was emotional at the time, his communication problem is understandable. That a family company did not call him to see if he was going to need a few days, that is a little harder to follow. I can see where he would question if he was part of the family.
>
> Not meant to insult you Kris, I just see his view a little better. When you are hurting you don't always think clearly. As the boss, you need to be anticipating what he is not saying in this situation. I hope y'all can work it out.
We don't have to agree, GA, I have no problem with that.
The first person that I called when my father passed was my boss (at the time). I'm going to have to think that this situation is a little odd if the man is more worried about his friend than his livelihood in this day and age (economy). I'm beginning to wonder if this wasn't his way of switching jobs... Kris probably didn't want to call out of respect of not knowing where the PC was at any given time with the friend (morgue, funeral home, in deep prayer session, etc.)
I hope to hear more on this from Kris later this evening.
That is possible, Carl, he may have even made up the accident to cover for his having an interview. After all, have you never faked someones death just to get out of work for a day (yes, that was sarcasm). It is just as possible that the friend is like a brother to him. I know there are some friends that I have that if they called needing help, I would be there, job or no job. Do you not have any friends that are "drop everything" friends? If one of those friends called you and said his wife had just been killed in a car accident, would you not pull up tripod and head to the house? I prefer to think this is one of those kinds of things. And if it is, then I can see where he would not be thinking about what does he need to do about work. He is thinking about what he needs to do to be there for his "brother". I love my job. But it is not more important than my family, both by blood and by choice!
When I think of the times I could have been understanding of other people's viewpoints and nicer about how I handled supervisory issues, I am ashamed of myself. Never miss a chance to help another traveler get through life. Explain your side and do what you have to do, but don't just assume it's okay to be an asshole, because you're in charge. (not calling you an asshole - just not very eloquent.) It gets to be a habit you aren't even aware of. I did always let my guys have water, so maybe I wasn't the WORST boss on the planet.
I think that Chris did well. We don't live in a perfect world and these things happen. It is unfortunate, but that is just the way it is. Possibly, if Chris thinks it appropriate, Chris can write or call the person and invite him back. If the guy chooses to return good for him. If he doesn't return so be it, but Chris should feel no guilt.
this is the worst job market i have ever seen. maybe prospects are better out texas way, but it would take a lot more than a harsh tone in a man's voice to get me to leave a paying job right now.
i hope he lands on his feet, but i wouldn't be able to offer him his job back. attitudes and shoulder chips do not play well at my shop. there are too many fish in the sea right now to be putting up with 'tude from an employee no matter how promising his future may look.
I didn't say and don't think I intimated that Kris should feel guilt. Wasn't meant that way.
