Time for a Beer
Sometimes when I reflect on all the beer I drink, I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. I think, "It is better to drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
Babe Ruth
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"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."
Lyndon B. Johnson
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"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
Paul Horning
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"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?
I think not."
H. L.. Mencken
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"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!"
George Bernard Shaw
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"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
Benjamin Franklin
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"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza."
Dave Barry
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BEER: HELPING UGLY PEOPLE HAVE SEX SINCE 3000 B.C.!
W. C. Fields
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Remember "I" before "E," except in Budweiser.
Professor Irwin Corey
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To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group -Salvation in a can!
Leo Durocher
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One night at Cheers, Cliff Calvin explained the" Buffalo Theory" to his buddy Norm:
"Well, ya see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members! ; In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first.. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine! That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."
Cliff was a genius
There has been some similar iterations of the Buffalo Theory. I used to keep one affixed to my refrigerator with a couple of those cutsey little refrigerator magnets that my ex-wife would get from her Tupperware, Pampered Chef, or Amway parties. You know, the ones with blue ducks, smiley faced frogs, or some flower.
She never quite got the joke. Key word "EX".
Maybe I should have used the ones I got from my annual Surveying Conferences.
Guinness is good for you.
Oatmeal Stout!
Not just for breakfast anymore...
A beer that will make a t**d.
🙂
Loyal
I like Oatmeal Stout.
Cliff was a genius
nope, if that got her goat then you used the right ones
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
Hardware - This is the part of the computer that
stops working when you spill beer on it.
- Dave Barry
I like reading in a pub rather than a library or study, as it's generally much easier to get a drink.
- Pete McCarthy
The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.
- W.C. Fields
Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
- Oscar Wilde
We lived for days on nothing but food and water.
- W.C. Fields
I recently discovered this beer: Mississippi Mud
I was surprised how good it is! I recommend everyone give it a try.
:beer: