Wife was doing her usual browsing and came across
Sagging left boob says to sagging right boob, 'We'd better lift our game before someone thinks we're nuts "
Old dear thought she was having hot flushes then realised her boob had lodged in the mug of coffee.
Marriage is like a deck of cards.
You begin with two hearts and a diamond.
Later in life you wish for two clubs and a spade.
This one makes sense in light of modern technology
"if I'm ever on life support and not much happening, turn it off and restart and check for any improvement "
*****
Oh dear. I I'm not sure these modern contraptions are good for humanity. They lead one astray.
Life was so much simpler in days before TV ipads etc.
I'm usually not one to joke at the expense of my wife...but...
Money Penny has been detained at the Bone and Joint Hospital for a few days for a knee replacement. I was up there today for moral support when the PT delivered her walker. And even though she is double digits younger than me, having a wife with a walker is a sobering thought. Probably more so for her than me. She's also disgusted with the though of mechanical aids to maintain ambulatory activity. She's convinced it's a temporary thing. I did tell her that was a necessary frame of mind if she has a full recovery as a target goal. 😉
But it's cool. A beautiful metallic blue with hand brakes and a great little upholstered area for use as a seat at stoplights. My one disappointment: no chrome. I have some vintage BSA decals that would look smart on the frame.
No need to do any planning on alterations or decorations. She'll be done with it sooner than you might imagine. Mrs. Cow was in her mid-40's when she had hip replacement surgery. It was amazing to see how quickly she was back to stomping on me with both feet when I had it coming.
My wife just passed the 3-month mark post-hip-replacement. The walker and cane have both been packed away for many weeks. She still has some pain from muscle weakness that she developed prior to surgery. Her PT says she lost tone in those muscles as she adapted her walking form to accommodate the painful hip. Now she has to rebuild those muscles to get everything working together they way it's supposed to.
paden cash, post: 424954, member: 20 wrote: But it's cool. A beautiful metallic blue with hand brakes and a great little upholstered area for use as a seat at stoplights. My one disappointment: no chrome. I have some vintage BSA decals that would look smart on the frame.
My mother in law lives with us and has a walker that is almost never used. She can stand and walk fine but has COPD and tires easily. She actually walks MUCH faster with her walker because she can use it to stand more upright and breathe more easily. I told her I was going to her one of the little tricycle bells to get people out of her way.
Andy
[USER=833]@Richard[/USER]
A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need of his good time being spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for one hour, awakened without pain, and as it was still early, she decided to go to the party. In as much as her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him.
She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice chick he could and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there. His wife up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new stuff that had just arrived.
She let him go as far as he wished; naturally, since he was her husband. Finally he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had a little. Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home and put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behavior.
She was sitting up reading when he came in and asked what kind of a time he had had. He said, "Oh the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when youre not there." The she asked, "Did you dance much?"
He replied, "Ill tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening. But Ill tell you... the guy I loaned my costume to, sure had a real good time!"
[USER=20]@paden cash[/USER]
Knee replacement is a common surgery for regaining bipedalism. She will be fine in a few weeks and be able to kick you in the ass once again. 😉
Positive thoughts to ya both.
paden cash, post: 424954, member: 20 wrote: I'm usually not one to joke at the expense of my wife...but...
Money Penny has been detained at the Bone and Joint Hospital for a few days for a knee replacement. I was up there today for moral support when the PT delivered her walker. And even though she is double digits younger than me, having a wife with a walker is a sobering thought. Probably more so for her than me. She's also disgusted with the though of mechanical aids to maintain ambulatory activity. She's convinced it's a temporary thing. I did tell her that was a necessary frame of mind if she has a full recovery as a target goal. 😉
But it's cool. A beautiful metallic blue with hand brakes and a great little upholstered area for use as a seat at stoplights. My one disappointment: no chrome. I have some vintage BSA decals that would look smart on the frame.
My Wife had a knee replaced in 2009. She should have had it done at least 3 years earlier. It extended her recovery at least a month by waiting and she only got about 90% mobility. Adhesions in her leg muscles caused by the bad knee was the culprit.
If she didn't wait too long it shouldn't be a difficult recovery.
To get full use, she needs to REALLY work on PT.
