Chuck Norris checks his Facebook with a typewriter.
I heard this over the weekend...thought I'd share.
Chuck Norris invented the color spectrum...
except pink....
Tom Cruise invented pink...
That is probably the best way to check it, if you must. I never check it, did join once because some old shipmates were corresponding on it. After learning more about it, I quit going there and now, almost everyday I have an E Mail to delete that is trying to chum me back in.
jud
When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris CAN divide by zero.
Dale
I heard that Chuck Norris and Superman had a fight to see who was the toughest. They had a bet, and whoever lost had to were his underwear outside his pants.
There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
Chuck Norris invented wet-naps when he looked at a napkin and it urinated on itself.
People say the magic word is ‘please’ as in “Please do not kill me”. Too bad Chuck Norris does not believe in magic.
Chuck Norris can make a Happy Meal cry.
Chuck Norris doesn't blink....
reality pauses.
Chuck Norris emails never come back "Undelivered"
When Chuck Norris does push-ups he doesnt push him self up he pushes the earth away.
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad
Chuck Norris...Daryl Moistner.... ?
Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone. :mp:
Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret. :angel:
Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd. No one fools Chuck Norris. 😉
Chuck Norris makes onions cry. :'(
A bulletproof vest wears Chuck Norris for protection. :hi5:
Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas. :-$
Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg. :good:
Chuck Norris can hit a homerun with a toothpick. (He needs to join the Cardinals!!) :clap:
Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete. :-O
And my favorite....
Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell Chuck Norris stories. :{: :}:
I altered this one for Daryl a while back...it goes:
"Surveyors sit around the campfire and tell Daryl Moistner stories!!" 😉
Chuck Norris...Daryl Moistner.... ?
