An engineer died and stopped at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter looked over his chart and had bad news. "According to my records, you are not scheduled to be admitted to heaven. You go to the other place." The engineer was disappointed, but followed the path down, down, down, past the creaky iron gates to Lucifer's fiery abyss.
A couple weeks later, St. Peter found the missing log entry. The engineer was supposed to be in heaven after all! So he called Lucifer. "You know that engineer we sent you, that was a mistake. He's ours. You need to send him back."
But by this time, Lucifer was getting used to having an Engineer on staff. "Send him back? Are you nuts? You've got plenty of engineers up there. This is the first one I ever got. And since he got here, things have been improving rapidly. The gates no longer creak. Most of our heat is run into giant generators that power the air-conditioning, The remaining heat is run into hot tubs everywhere! We have cool water piped all throughout Hades! The network stays running! It's like heav--, I mean, it's great! Not only that, but the clocks now all read the right time; nothing is blinking 12:00, which drove me nuts! I'm going to keep him and there's nothing you can do about it!"
St. Peter was insistent, though. "If you don't send him back, why, I'll sue. I promise you, I'll sue."
Lucifer laughed. "Sue? Don't be silly. Where are YOU going to find a lawyer?"
As an engineer, I approve this message!
Q: When did you know you would become an engineer?
A: When no one else in the house could set the time on the VCR but me.
Then Gabriel ask Peter "is he a civil engineer?"
And St Peter said "Oh yes, very polite".
BRAVO!!!!
I'm sure there is a land Surveyor down in hell busily pincushioning all of Lucifer's original monuments saying they weren't called for on the original plat of hell.
andrewm, post: 405593, member: 10888 wrote: As an engineer, I approve this message!
Q: When did you know you would become an engineer?
A: When no one else in the house could set the time on the VCR but me.
You are kidding right? I have always thought the red blinking 12:00 was a power on indicator? 😉
[USER=50]@Holy Cow[/USER]
See ya there in the afterlife my friend!
Had a physics professor explain that there are no hot spots in Hell. His theory revolved around the fact that if there were such hot spots they would be populated with physics professors who would take advantage of the temperature differentials to power all sorts of devices, including air conditioning systems. That, of course, would destroy Hell. Therefore, there can be no hot spots in Hell.
Two versions:
https://jonathanturley.org/2010/04/28/hell-exothermic-of-endothermic/
http://w.astro.berkeley.edu/~gmarcy/thermal/tpteacher/jokes/hell.html