You know yer old.....

When you call a teenager to "do stuff with your cell phone". Because you have no idea...

Posted by: @nate-the-surveyor

When you call a 5 YO to "do stuff with your cell phone". Because you have no idea...

There, I fixed for you...

• There are three signs of old age. The first is your loss of memory. I forget the other two.

• Middle age is when work is a lot less fun - and fun is a lot more work.

• Statistics show that at the age of seventy, there are five women to every man. Now isn't that a great time for a guy to get those kind of odds?

• You know you're getting on in years when the girls at the office start confiding in you.

• Middle age is when it takes longer to rest than to get tired.

• Middle age is when you have stopped growing at both ends, and have begun to grow in the middle.

• You know you're into middle age when you realize that caution is the only thing you care to exercise.

• You're getting old when you wake up with that morning-after feeling, and you didn't do anything the night before!

• The cardiologist's diet: if it tastes good, spit it out.

• It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.

• When you lean over to pick something up off the floor, you ask yourself if there is anything else you need to do while you are down there

You know you've crossed some sort of line in life when you are only 32 and dating a grandmother.