Today, a funeral was held for a 78-year old lady in our community. One of my friends was one of the pall bearers. He nearly created an incident at the funeral.
But, first. Let me explain. He is one of those guys who only owns one suit, and it gets very little use. A few years ago he bought a really nice suit. Today was the first time he needed it. Did I happen to mention that he has lost over 60 lb. since buying the suit. When he put on the pants he realized he had a problem. He tried to jerryrig his "good" belt to make things work. He figured the jacket would cover most of the worst appearing folds and scrunches.
Back to the funeral. Of course, he was seated in the front row. As the grieving family entered to take their seats, everyone rose. His belt snapped. Suddenly, he was grabbing his pants with both hands. Trying to be as inconspicuous as possible, he excused himself, went out the door, drove seven miles home, found another belt that would work but which did not match his suit/shoes, drove seven miles back to the church and tried to quietly get back to his appointed seat on the front pew.
Oh, my. What if the belt had waited to snap just as the pall bearers were placing the casket on the support at the cemetery? Oh, he told me something about himself that I definitely did not know. He doesn't wear underwear.
Beats the time the fireman were pallbearers at a firemans funeral locally. The man had very little money and had prepaid his funeral.
Anyway, when the pallbearers took hold of the casket and walked about 10 feet, the deceased fell out of the bottom of the cheap casket with the pallbearers still holding the casket.
